I have to make the embarrassing confession that at one point in my life I didn't know the difference between my tonsils and my testicles. It's true. And of course there's a story behind it. It goes something like this:

Around 1964, I found myself sharing a hospital room with sister, Kim. She was there to have her tonsils removed, and I figured I was there for the same reason. After all, it made sense, because we often did everything together, such as digging for bugs in the front yard and having colds. So it made sense that we would be there to have our tonsils removed.

It's been a long time, a really l-o-n-g time, and I don't remember if they wheeled Kim or me out of the room first for our surgeries.

My next memory of that unfortunate day had us back in the hospital bed, side by side. Don't worry. It's OK. We were just 4 or 5 years old. It was also during a time when hospitals weren't so quick to push you out the door. Pretty soon, I expect them to have outpatient brain surgery.

Anyway, getting back to the story, the next day a nurse brought in a dish of ice cream for Kim. At that time, you got some ice cream after you had your tonsils removed. I don't know if they still do that.

I kept waiting for my ice cream, but it never arrived. So what did I get? Well, to use that old cliche: Nada-zip-nothing-zero. Well, not nothing, to be fair. When I got up to use the bathroom, I noticed that I had a small piece of gauze over my equally small privates. And then I noticed that under the gauze were stitches – stitches on my privates. If it sounds painful, I can tell you that it was! 40+ years later, and I still remember that it hurt.

A few days later, and it was all over and life went on.

I had been circumcised! Now for those of you who don't know the difference between your penis and your testicles, the doctors had removed my foreskin. So – circumcised, not castrated. Two very different things. Believe me, you want the former and NEVER the latter. If you haven't hear either of these words, find a dictionary or better yet, visit Wikipedia.

 
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